“I just want my money back.” – Getty Images
Dear Quentin,
I believed a “friend” who talked me into giving him $20,000 with the promise that he would buy a car for me and my wife. I knew this guy. We met several times in person, and he explained that once I gave him the money that I could trust him.
This happened in March 2021. I have contacted the police and given them everything I knew about this guy: his address, phone number and email. The guy lives in another state so getting a lawyer is tough, but not impossible — just costly.
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The guy has since ghosted me and has not responded to texts or emails. To top it off, I have no real proof — only one witness who was scammed as well. Most of my proof is in text messages with T-Mobile and for legal reasons they can’t give me a copy of our texts.
I feel like an idiot. I need every cent to retire, and I just want my money back.
Scammed in California
Related: ‘He broke down in tears’: I gave my contractor $100,000, but he used it to pay off his debts. What chance do I have of getting my money back?
“The hard truth is that this money is likely gone. Without a receipt, it’s your word against his.” – MarketWatch illustration
Dear Scammed,
When dealing with “friends” and business partners, cash is not king.
In an ideal world, trust someone before you give them money and, whether it’s business or personal, always get a receipt. If it’s a loan, you need to sign a notarized loan agreement. If none of the above happens, the recipient can merely claim it’s a gift.
In California, “theft by false pretenses” involves one party taking your property by either lying to you or by making a false promise. “The fact is that ‘false pretenses’ is a theft crime just like shoplifting or grand theft auto,” according to the Shouse California Law Group.
“If you are charged with this crime, you may face the same kinds of penalties as someone who is charged with one of those more conventional kinds of theft,” the law firm adds. But proving this can be notoriously difficult — that is, assuming you can even track him down.
You can threaten to go to the district attorney’s office or the Better Business Bureau, in addition to the police, if he does not repay your money. Send him a registered letter that establishes a firm deadline and what you will do, as outlined above, if he does not meet it.
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The hard truth
The hard truth is that this money is likely gone. Without a receipt, it’s your word against his. If you are aged 65 or older, his actions could be seen as elder abuse, which is defined as the physical or emotional abuse, neglect or financial exploitation of someone 65 or older.
Elder abuse in California is punishable either as a misdemeanor, which could result in a term in county jail of up to one year, or as a felony, which is punishable by up to four years in state prison. A financial crime is defined as theft, fraud or embezzlement.
If it was an electronic transfer? You can compile your “documentary evidence,” which refers to any written or recorded material that is relevant to the alleged crime, according to the Law Offices of Mark M. Childress, a law firm with offices in Texas.
Hefty legal fees
“This can include things like receipts, invoices, bank statements, contracts and so on,” the law firm says. “This evidence helps establish ownership or prove financial transactions related to the stolen property … Documents help establish a clear timeline of events.”
If you handed this person $20,000 cash, it would be extremely challenging to prove this was not a gift or, in fact, that you gave him the money at all. It could be his word against yours, and a reputable attorney will tell you whether it’s even worth pursuing the case.
It’s a lot of money, but it could end up costing you so much in legal fees by the time you are done that it’s not worth the effort. Hiring an attorney to help you fight this case could cost between $250 and $800 an hour, or $5,000 to $25,000 for fraud.
Your case is too large to file in the small-claims court, and hiring an attorney could end up costing you thousands of dollars in legal fees, so you are stuck between a rock (the stolen money) and a hard place (the cost to you to bring this person to justice).
Do you want to go through all of this for $20,000?
Previous columns by Quentin Fottrell:
‘I have a modest Roth IRA that hasn’t performed well’: My wife and I are savers — and happy driving old cars. Where should we invest $15,000?
Are they cheap?’ I’m taking a trip with two friends for Memorial Day. I’m spending $90 on gas, and neither offered to chip in. What should I do?
‘He’s planning to bleed me dry’: My husband turned into a monster after we married. I own a $1.3 million home. How do I save my finances?
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